Skip to main content

Is My Mom’s Boyfriend Doing Me More Harm Than Good?

From the U.S.: As of right now I’m wondering if her boyfriend is doing more harm than good. Me and my mom used to fight a lot worse. We all live under the same roof. Me, my son, her and her boyfriend.

Her boyfriend has never liked me. He never says anything positive. Sure what he says may be true but I think it’s not helping. Me and my mom fight a lot but what I’m concerned about is her mood changes when her boyfriend is around. Like today we had a great day. Lots of laughing. We had our friend over and we were all in the spa and my son was splashing and things were great. I leave to take my son to baseball practice and when I return she is in complete hate mode towards me. And when I left we just had a fun day and things were good.

I ask what’s wrong and she tells me “oh you don’t give me attitude one day and we’re fine?” I’m curious if it’s bad that whenever she’s with her boyfriend in her room all the talk between them is him talking negatively about me. I’m wondering if that would stress our situation and not make it any better because he’s there fueling her brain and reminding her what a f*** up her daughter is. Thanks for any response.

You say that what the boyfriend says is true. If that’s the case, the problem isn’t the boyfriend. The problem is that you and your mother don’t have an adult relationship. Rather than blame the boyfriend, it would probably be more productive to look hard at yourself and take responsibility for your part in the fights — and fix them.

If you can’t do that, it’s time for you to move out and make your own life with your son.

Bottom line; It’s not healthy for your son to be watching the grown-ups fight all the time. It’s not healthy for the grown-ups to be fighting.

If you can’t work this out among yourselves, consider seeing a mediator or therapist to help you.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie



from Ask the Therapist https://ift.tt/2KJiwgw
via IFTTT

Become a patron of The Carlisle Wellness Network. Show everyone that you think this service is worth at least a buck. Go to; https://www.patreon.com/carlislewellness and pledge one dollar per month and help improve the resources it takes to gather the articles you see here as well as create fresh content including interviews an podcasts. We only need one dollar per month from all of our patrons to give The Carlisle Wellness Network a bright furture in the health and wellness social media ecosystem.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

PET Imaging Agent Can ID Good Candidates for Depression Drug

A new brain imaging agent could reveal — before any treatment has been prescribed — whether a patient with major depressive disorder (MDD) is likely to respond to a particular antidepressant, according to a new study published in The Journal of Nuclear Medicine. No such marker is currently available in clinical psychiatry.Escitalopram (Lexapro), a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI), can be an effective MDD treatment for some patients, but not all. During  positron emission tomography (PET) test, the tracer 11C-DASB targets the serotonin transporter protein (5-HTT) in the amygdala of the brain, a region associated with emotional processing.In the study, patients shown to have less 5-HTT protein were those who later experienced relief from escitalopram.“MDD is a heterogeneous disorder, which makes it extremely difficult to treat effectively,” said researcher Mala R. Ananth, a graduate student at Stony Brook University in Stony Brook, N.Y.“Optimizing treatment is challenging a…

Reducing Alzheimer’s Stigma Could Enhance Research

A new study suggests ongoing research on Alzheimer’s disease may be challenged by the stigma associated with the disease. This concern comes from the results of a national survey which discovered people may be afraid to admit they have early stage Alzheimer’s because of fear of discrimination — especially potential limitations on their health insurance.Researchers say these fears can hopefully be overcome by the development of new policies to protect individuals. Nondisclosure of early symptoms that may or may not be Alzheimer’s hinders a individuals ability to obtain timely care. Additionally, a person may miss the opportunity to participate in clinical studies that discover potential therapies.The finding are the results of a national survey about what beliefs, attitudes and expectations are most often associated with Alzheimer’s disease. The survey results appear in Alzheimer’s & Dementia: The Journal of the Alzheimer’s Association.“We found that concerns about discrimination a…

Hair Pulling, Nail Biting, Skin Peeling and Biting

All my life I’ve bitten my nails. It’s caused me a lot of trouble, especially with my bipolar mother who has always thought screaming and shouting at me (and often a smack when I was younger) would make me stop.At around 7 I also started biting and peeling the skin on my fingers which has caused a lot of social and health issues for me from being to ashamed to join in with prayers at school, to getting my fingers getting a fungal infection causing long lasting damage to my fingers.Soon after I started to pull out the tiny hairs on my legs during school assembles and by 12 I began to pull my eyebrow hair out.How can I stop doing this to myself? I don’t even realise I’m doing it half the time (I started biting the skin around my fingers just writing this and caused it to bleed a little). I’m afraid to bring this up with my parents because of how they have reacted in the past and I’m far too embarrassed to ask anyone I would typically trust. It has severally impacted how I interact with …