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Feeling Hopeless for the Future

I have a problem. I don’t feel like I have a happy future ahead of me. Here are some reasons why I’m feeling down. I don’t enjoy my job, I have close to zero friends ever since I quit drinking and drugs, I’m always worrying about things that don’t even matter, I still think about the girl who broke my heart over ten years ago, My brother (who I love very much) lives on the other side of the country, I don’t know where to meet a decent girl that I could start a family with, I don’t have the spark or motivation to hold conversations with people, I have very little interest in many of the things I used to enjoy doing, and frankly, I’m afraid that I’m going to die alone without a family. These are just a few things I’m struggling with. On the flip side, I have a very good life (on paper). I have a mom and dad who love me and care about me, i have a roof over my head, food in the fridge, and water in the sink. Most people would say I have nothing to complain about which is probably true. So I’m just wondering, why do I feel so hopeless for the future? I try very hard to be positive but I’m constantly waking up in a foul mood wishing I was still in dreamland. I’m very quiet at work because I simply don’t have the energy to engage in conversation. People probably think that I don’t like them or that I’m better than everyone else, but the truth is, I just don’t have the ambition to talk with people like I did when I was younger. I just feel so old but I’m only 27. Please help.

First, let’s celebrate the fact that you are no longer drinking or doing drugs. If anything good is going to happen, giving these up is a good start. But I didn’t hear you mention any 12-steep programs like Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous. I mention these because most who give up drugs and alcohol have to rebuild their lives through relationships and improving their well-being. No longer doing what was detrimental to you is a great start, but the extension of the skills you now need has to do with relationship and commitment.

I’d highly recommend you click on the links above for these 12-step programs and find an open meeting that is close to you and go see what they have to offer. The meetings are free (you can donate if you want) they are widely available and have some of the best practices for rebuilding your life in the ways you want.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

from Ask the Therapist

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